Questions to be Answered before You Become a Stepmother

Talk openly with your husband about your role within the family. Both of you need to express your views and arrive at something everyone feels comfortable with.

1. Do either of us know any stepmothers? What role did they appear to have in their families?

2. What have we each imagined a stepmom’s role to be in our family?

3. How do we want the children to think of or behave toward their stepmom?

4. What do we think a stepmother should be willing to give? Do? Share?

5. How much of the daily responsibility of raising children should a stepmom have? Driving to day care or school? Shopping for groceries?

6. What kind of authority should a stepmom take on? Getting kids to help with dishes? Sending them to their rooms when they’re bad?

7. Should Stepmom be required to take care of the children when Dad is not around?

8. Is it appropriate for Stepmom to be involved with the communications between Mom’s house and Dad’s house?

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