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Getting to Know the Kids: Be Their Friends
The first time I met my stepmother, Nancy, my two younger brothers and I thought it would be funny to bring along a whoopee cushion. The plan for the evening involved dinner and a movie. We raced ahead of the adults to find seats in the theater, and before she sat down in the half-darkness, we slipped the cushion onto her seat.
Questions to be Answered before You Become a Stepmother
Talk openly with your husband about your role within the family. Both of you need to express your views and arrive at something everyone feels comfortable with. 1. Do either of us know any stepmothers? What role did they appear to have in their families?
Empowerment to Become Stepmother
In many of the resources out there for stepmothers, there is an abundance of “woe is me” tales that can inspire dread in the hearts of even the most stalwart of women. The horror stories of stepmothers tortured by teens gone wild, vindictive exes, intrusive former in-laws, and wimpy spouses are all true.
Free to Be Me
Here’s an exercise designed to help you see what your comfort zone is, to help you figure out what kind of stepmother you want to be. Consider the statements as jumping-off points, and if something rings true for you, follow it and see where it leads.
How to Take the Heart of Your Stepchildren? Part (2)
Psychologist and author Patricia Papernow called the role “intimate outsider,” in which you are close and part of the family, but you are also just a bit outside so you have a more objective viewpoint. Your role is also going to depend on what ages the kids are when you marry their dad. Children’s behavior changes as they move from one developmental stage to the next.