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Learn the Culture before You Can be Effective Part (3)

Learn the Culture before You Can be Effective Part (3)

“I got to know them oneon- one and they each made an effort. That was the key. They weren’t ‘The Kids.’ And they were all so hungry. They love their mother, but my stepson would just talk and talk and talk. I would need to change clothes and he would keep talking through the door. He was very open and they were all willing to just know me.”

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Learn the Culture before You Can be Effective Part (2)

Learn the Culture before You Can be Effective Part (2)

You first interview everyone and find out how things have been working before you begin implementing changes. It’s the same with stepfamilies. So take time to gather information before you demand allegiance from the kids. If you have more than one stepchild, it’s easy to fall into the habit of treating the kids as if they’re in a pack.

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Learn the Culture before You Can be Effective

Learn the Culture before You Can be Effective

You might be used to running the show at work, but when you start a job, you must learn the culture before you can be effective. You know when you take on a new client it’s going to take time and work to get to a place where you trust each other.

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Get Into Your Kid World: Get Their Heart

Get Into Your Kid World: Get Their Heart

The children moved constantly, chewing and chatting. Arne’s son told me facts about the Titanic, his middle daughter talked about her best friend who lived down the street, and the youngest girl said she could jump all the way across the room on one foot. Arne tried to get them to behave, to eat slowly, to remove their elbows from the table.

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Getting to Know the Kids: Be Their Friends Part (2)

Getting to Know the Kids: Be Their Friends Part (2)

That moment in the theater meeting Dad’s girlfriend for the first time came back to me, and I felt sick. What did his kids have in store for me? Would they try to embarrass me in front of their father? Would they hate me? Would we get along? It took thirty-five minutes to drive out to his house from my apartment in the city, and it was like driving from one country to another.